As a little girl, I remember my grandfather, my dad's father, Pete Janszen (Gramps) saying this and other phrases in German. I felt very special to have this heritage, and loved having Gramps say all kinds of things, especially a little nursery rhyme in German. I have loved my German heritage. Little did I know, God was planning all along to bring a precious German girl into our lives many years later.
Last year, on the first day of school, Esther, our middle daughter, came home telling us about a cute foreign exchange student who was in her Alg. 2 class.
She said she was so pretty and she LOVED the way she talked, in broken, German accented English. Day after day, Esther would come home and speak more of Stella. She envited her over to go to the movies with our family, the second week she was here. I am not sure if she could understand much, it was the remake of Ben Hur, but we had a great time together. Esther, continued to reach out to Stella, and invited her to come to our home every Monday morning, to a Klife small group Bible study before school.
About the same time, Stella tried out for the Cross Country team, and started running with Ruth. Stella did not realize Esther and Ruth were sisters, since they look nothing alike! Ruth felt called to start a XC Bible study, and Stella started coming to that also.
After a few weeks, she put together that these 2 were sisters!! She began coming to our home for some family dinners, and the girls were driving her to Klife Klub meetings as well. God was definately weaving our lives together!!
Through the semester we were getting to know her, and as we got deeper, it became apparent that Stella did not know the Lord as her Savior, though she had been to church back in Germany, she did not have that personal trust in Him to save her. But she was courious, and continued to come, ask questions, and was such a joy to be around. One morning, I overheard someone crying at the girls Bible study in the other room. Not wanting to be nosey, I stayed out of the room, but later asked Esther if all was ok. She shared that stella was not happy in her host home, and was asking for prayer to know what to do.
My heart broke for this sweet girl, and I shared with Ray what I had learned.
He said he wanted me to pray about what we were to do concerning our role with Stella.
"What? What do you mean?! What role? You mean keep having her over for Bible study and some family meals?"
"No, I mean does she need to come live with us?"
"You have got to be kidding me?!" I thought! I already have enough kids, I don't need another child, let alone another teenage girl! And where would she sleep, we already have 3 girls in one room, granted they are in the master, but still, another high school girl!!
I told him I would pray about it, but I wasn't going to tell a soul! I didn't want anyone getting any ideas. (Now, I know this is so selfish, I know, but at the time, I couldn't see it any other way!)
Well, after 2 weeks of praying for Stella's sitution to improve at her host home, and yes praying for however God wanted us to play a role, Esther came home from school one day and said, "Mom, Stella asked me if she might could come live with us!!"
She told her she didn't know, it would be up to her parents, but I was floored. I knew right then and there that obviously God was up to somehting and was already working, because He had layed it on Ray's heart 2 weeks early, and had me praying about it to prepare myself.
We had a family meeting, talked about the pros and cons and then Ray said, "Guys, what if God wanted to use our family to point Stella to Him, and we were too selfish to accept this plan? Our lives are a blip, and the time stella is in the USA is a blip of a blip!! We will regret if we do not open ourselves up, and our home. Let us be willing!" We ALL agreed, and knew he was right. We began the paperwork the next week, and a week after that, December 15, stella came to live with the Ford Family.
The funny thing is, stella is an only child, from a divorced family, so to move into a home with 7 family members, 3 sister, 2 brothers, and parents, was more of a shock to her than her to us!!
She said she loved it, Stella is a very friendly outgoing person, who loves to talk with people and loves activity!! Well, she found it in our crazy home!
Right after she moved in, we had finals coming up, then Christmas break. For some reason, I thought Stella would be returning to Germany for the holidays, but I quickly found out she would be with us!! Back to the store, Santa needed to come visit Stella as well!! We also wanted to get her gifts, but the most important thing we wanted to give her was Jesus. He really is it, the most amazing thing, so we gave her her very own Bible, she had been borrowing one for small group and XC Bible study.
Christmas took us to Texas again this year, to the ranch. Stella didn't know what to expect, she said she had heard Texas wasn't that interesting, only dust and cowboys!! Well, she was partly right, but since the ranch in in the Brazos River valley and right on the edge of the Texas Hill Country, it is more than just dust, though we do have some cowboys.
Babe, my mom, and Stella's American grandmother for the time being, gave stella her very own cowgirl boots!!
Christmas day was wonderful, but emotional for Stella, I can only imagine being away from my family at 16 on Christmas day!! But the sweetest part was when she got her Bible. I thought she was just missing her family, but the tears fell as she read the note we had written in the front. The next evening, the girls were up in the balcony coloring and visiting quietly. All of a sudden, the girls came running to the edge hollaring! "Stella just became a Crhistian!!" The girls came running down the stairs, with Stella saying, "I am saved, I am saved!!" As we talked through the conversation they had just had, mainly between Stella and Esther, with Raylee (my neice) and Anna also a part, they shared the questions that Stella had been asking and the answers she was looking for. Stella shared how she knew Jesus wanted something from her ever since she moved in with us, and after she got her Bible she knew even more, and now she realizes, it was HER He wanted. He wanted to save HER, He wanted a relationship with HER, Oh GLORY!! Hallelujah. She is saved indeed!!!
Our family was humbled, excited, and grateful all at the same time. Stella, who continued to live with us until the end of May, was, is a new creation for all eternity. We are so grateful we did not let all our selfish petty reasons for not wanting Stella to come live with us, get in the way of the bigger plan God was working in all our lives.
From Christmas on, it was like Sunday school in our home. Stella asked all of us, at different times, for the five and a half months, about scripure, about God, about what in means to live out your faith. It was such a blessing for all of us, as we were forced to answer questions we maybe hadn't dealt with in years. Who is the enemy? Why does he want to attack us? How does he attack? What will heaven be like? What does it mean to live out our faith in this or that sitution?
And probably my favorite, one evening, the girls and I, along with Stella, were talking aobut what Jesus did. Stella kept saying, "I just don't understand why He would do that for me, I am so overwhelmed with thankfulness, I have no words!!! Can we just stop and praise Him right now for what He has done?" YES!! we all replied, and what a sweet time we all had together, just thanking Him in prayer for the sacrifice He made. What a great reminder for all us girls, we just get so used to it, we casually say, "Yes, Jesus died for us and we are thankful." But how often are we really overwhelmed with gratefulness, that we have no words?! Not me, I almost always have words! But I want to be more like this. So thankful, so overwhelmed for His love for me.
Stella brought this fresh reminder back to our family!! We love our German daughter, we are thankful God in His grace and mercy, brought her to our family, inspite of us!! He saved her, He lifted the veil off her eyes, He saved her, and we got to be close observers of this change. Glory to His name.
As we sent her back home after the end of May, it was hard to let her go, knowing she doesn't have any community of believers back home, but God is faithful! He goes with her, He will provide, and His Holy Spirit can give her understanding as she continues to study His word. And, we knew we were not saying goodbye forever. She is planning to come visit next summer, and go to Kanakuk with us, and we have the assurance that we have eternity with her. God is so good.
Auf Wiedersehen,
JJ
Most of you that know me, know I am a Martha! For sure!! Love, Love, Love being in the kitchen.....food is my love language. Anyone sad, how about a cookie? Bad day at work, Bluebell vanilla milk shake, want to put your feet up? Chips and salsa comin' right up! No question, even though I like people, and do enjoy a good sit down and visit, I love being in the kitchen and hearing the laughter of friends and family in the other room enjoying some fellowship with a treat I have prepared for them. But, God has been showing me something........
First of all, let me back up, this past fall BSF (Bible Study Fellowship) was planning on studying the Book of John. Ok, confession,...... I don't like the book of John! Yikes! I said it! I feel bad, but it is the truth. What am I going to say to John when I meet him one day in heaven? It's just sooooo wordy and flowery. "In the beginning was the Word and the Word was with God and the Word was God,........" My goodness John, just say Jesus was there in the beginning!!! Just drives me nuts, I mean, I was a PE/Art major, I don't really like wordiness, just spit it out! I am more of a Matthew/Peter kind of girl!!
Well, anyway, because I loved the women in my BSF group, and I am desperate for friends, still new in Stillwater, I decided to gut it up and go!! Maybe God wanted me to give John another chance. Ok, so after I got through the first chapter, I have to say, it grew on me. John really is a good book! Ha! I know some of you are horrified with my confession here, I mean come on!! It's THE book we send new believers to to START reading the Bible! Anyway, I have and am continuing to appreciate more and more what I am learning and studying through John. But one of my favorite nuggets is about Mary.
In Chapter 11 verse 2, it says, "It was That Mary," as he begins to tell us the story of Lazarus. "That Mary" It made me stop in my tracks. It was that Mary who anointed Jesus with fragrant oil and wiped His feet with her hair. He wanted us to know that this was a special Mary, not the one that just sat as His feet. Not just another of the many Mary's of that time, popular name! It was THAT Mary. The one that loved Jesus so adauciously that she sacrificed a bottle of fragrant oil, very costly, and annointed His feet, then wiped them with her hair. The whole room was filled with the beautiful smells of her sacrifice unto the Lord. Everyone in the room was aware of her shamless love for Him. I want to be THAT Mary, or rather THAT JJ. I want to sacrifice all, I want my love for my Saviour, to fill every area I go. Not so that people with think great of me, but will think, what in the world is so special about this Jesus that He invokes such devotion, sacrifice, and adoration? He must be awesome or she must be crazy! I am sure there will be those that will think I am crazy, stupid, or foolish, consider what Judas said about her. But all that matters is what He thinks. I want to be THAT JJ.
I am not there yet, but I want to work, daily, towards loving Him with such abandantment that I forget about myself.
And just think, I would have missed this had I not given the Gospel of John another chance.
God is good,
JJ
(This post is 2 years old, found it in my drafts, just never posted it. Jesse wasn't even in college yet, and Bryce Petty was still Baylor's quarterback. Not funny, but an encouraging reminder.)
"It's easier to watch, because I know how this will end," says Ray as he settles in to watch the recorded football game of Baylor vs. OU, the day after it was played.
Ray and Jesse had gone to check out a possible college football opportunity for Jesse next year, and missed the entire game of BU vs. OU on Saturday. Jesse and Ray got ESPN updates the whole time though, so they knew the final score as the game ended in real time.
The next day, Ray settled in to watch the game, and started from the beginning. Even though Baylor got 3 points on the board first, OU came back with a vengence, and before we knew it, had scored twice on Baylor, without hardly taking a breath. If you didn't know it, it looked as if this was going to be a tough game for Baylor, and the momentum was moving in the Sooners' favor. At this point, Ray looked over and said, "It's easier to watch this, knowing how it will end."
I just sat there and stared at him. He looked over,
"What?"
"Did you hear what you just said?"
"What?"
"It's easier to watch, because you know how it will end?!"....."Ray, that will preach!"
He smiled, because, you see, we are going through some stuff in our little family, that seems right now, to have about knocked us out. Ok, you may feel like I am over dramatizing, but honestly, we have felt as if we have been so knocked down, so defeated, so lost, that there is no possibility of victory or recovery. We have felt like complete failures as parents, and failures in our faith that God can even do anything about it. The enemy has got the momentum, has scored on us multiple times, and seems to be lining back up at our goal line, ready to punch it in again!
We have looked at these defeats as the FINAL outcome, and not as battles that must be fought in this greater war that we are in.
If we knew how it would end, it would be easier to watch. YES! But we do know how it will end!! We do!! The great enemy of old, still fights to destroy our marriages, our families, and take our children for his own victory. It may seem as if he has won, FEEL like he has won, and that there is no hope, or even reason to keep fighting, weilding that sword in prayer, because we see this so many times as the ENTIRE war. But it is not. It is only a battle, the first quarter, one of many that we will fight, in this greater war that is ulitmately already won. These battles we are going through now, are worth fighting through, because though we feel like we may have lost somewhat, and given ground to the enemy, we have not lost, we are still fighting, still in this.
By God's grace, He had me listening to another book, right when this thing seemed to rear it's ugly head, He is Faithful by Carol Cymbola. I highly recommend if you are needing some encouragement that God is faithful through ALL that we go through, whether it is self emposed, or nothing of our own doing. Of course, it goes along with my favorite verse, my life verse, which is found in Lamentations 3:22-23 "It is of the Lord's mercies that we are not consumed, because His compassions fail not. They are new every morning, great is Thy faithfulness."
Every morning, isn't that awesome, we get to hit the reset button every 24 hours. All I know is that I feel down 14-3 in the game, but I have to realize, we are only in the first quarter, and I have seen the end, so even though, it may not make it as easy as watchin' our Bears get whooped up on for the first 15 min, as it is watching my kids get whooped up on by the enemy, I can say, knowing how this thing will end, Jesus gets final victory in their lives, in my life, and this world, it makes these daily battles easier to watch, and yes, also encourages me to keep the shoulder pads on, keep running out there on that field, keep weilding that sword in prayer, because Bryce Petty is bound to get that ball and throw for a first! And then baby, watch out!! The momentum will start rolling, and we are off and running to kick the enemies rear!
Hallelujah,
JJ
(P.S. - Since I am posting this almost 2 years later, I can honestly say God did win the victory in these areas we felt were soooo difficult and impossible!! But with God ALL things are possible!)
(Found this post back in my drafts and never posted it. So it is a year late, but worth a little laugh!!)
You know you are the last 2 of 5 children, when you go to meet the teacher night without your parents!! This is exactly what Joshua and Anna did this year. We had just moved to Stillwater, so no one knew us, had no idea that we actually DO care about our kids, and don't just let them roam the town on their bikes by themselves! But, this is exactly what it looked like to thier teachers.
The kids had asked if we could ride bikes with our neighbors to meet the teacher night, and I had said it all depended on when Ray and I got back to the house. We had run a quick errand, and were going to return to the house in a few minutes. Ruth was there at the house, but really didn' tknow what we were doing with the kids after we got back. When we got home, we asked Ruth where the kids were, it was time to head to the school, and she said they had left with our neighbors!!
I ran back out to the car screaming to Ray, "Hurry, get to the school!! The kids went with the neighbors, and are at meet the teacher night without us!!"
We spead to the school, and ran to their classrooms as quickly as we could. We found Anna first, who had picked up all her papers, met her teacher, and said she had told the teacher she wasn't sure if we were coming tonight!! " How embarrasing!! Not wanting to set her straight, and give an appearance of an abusive parent, since I already looked like a negligent parent to her teacher now anyway, I tried to explain that they had left with our neighbors and had been confused. Her teacher just kept saying, "Well, Anna just wasn't sure if you were coming tonight or not!!" I was so embarrassed, I got nervous, and started talking WAY to much, trying to sound like a good parent, but sounding like an idiot instead, and really making Anna's teacher wary of us. Oh well, so much for first impressions!!
Joshua's teacher and scenerio was almost an exact repeat. So imbarrassed, I grabbed the kids hands, smiled as I left the building, then read them the right act outside, all while smiling, incase the teachers were watching.
Don't think we are going to win parent of the year in Stillwater this year!!
